Speak Mouth or Forever Hold Your Teeth

Advice
Dear Abby is dead, but no problem. We've got your advice right. First there's some advice about fleas, and now I've added advice about Kittens.

Submissions
Read the rant that answers the question Is Rock Dead?, which is taken from the amazing and entertaining site Observing Obscure Kulture.

Miss Fidget's submission to The Onion's Pathetic Geek Stories, The Repeated Pants.

Famous Folks
Dead Elvis Week is here with a big anniversary. Where was I the week the King died? Find out here, soon.

Read of true encounters with presidents Richard Nixon, James Earl Carter and Wiliam Jefferson Clinton.

Poetry
See the amazing haiku form element hybrid, the Haiku-Tron.

Found this poem on my night stand the other morning, not sure if I need more, or less medicine.

Herr Doctor I keep dreaming of long skinny boats going through beautifully rounded tunnels. What could it mean?